SMALL TOWN THERAPIST'S RED HOT TIPS

 

This beautiful photo was taken by Nate Ross

I self published a book through Barnes and Noble* on December 9.  We had a little ceremony at our library because I'd gotten so much help from Anthony, the librarian. I told the audience, the friends and family I'd invited, "It was so simple, all I did was push this little button on my computer and boom! it published a book." Ha ha. The reality is the book was in the works for many years. 

I started writing my ideas about my life and my counseling practice in a blog, susansmagicfeather.blogspot.com, in 2011. That blog is still ongoing. In the blog are stories, some autobiographical, some about the techniques I used in therapy sessions, some about why I became a psychotherapist. I wrote what interested me in life and what was helpful to my clients---what techniques worked and what didn't. It is still my sincere desire to continue helping people be happier and healthier.

Then the pandemic hit in 2020. Remember, at first we had no reassurance that people were going to survive the plague and no vaccines to prevent getting Covid. I kept thinking, "What's going to happen to all my work if I'm dead and gone?" So during the pandemic I reexamined the blog posts and selected the best ones, the ones most pertinent to my work as a counselor. I kept writing and rewriting my thoughts and ideas for a happier, healthier life. Then it became obvious that I was actually writing a book. The tips that are in the book, I believe, were helpful to my clients, and to me as well. They just might be helpful to anyone who reads the book.

Being a psychotherapist in a small town is different than being a therapist in a big city. For example, it was not unusual for my clients to stop me on the street to either arrange a meeting or just to chat. Sometimes clients would stop my husband in town and give him a check.  "Give this to your wife," they'd say, even though he hadn't a clue that I was seeing them. Apparently, they didn't care. Of course, confidentiality was imperative for me but the clients could make their own choices. 

My clients were great. They gave me hope, inspiration and kept me hopping. I had to constantly and diligently increase my knowledge because there weren't many other therapists to refer people to. I had to keep myself abreast of the newest and most effective techniques for the benefit of my clients.

Here's a recent slice of life in a small town. I was in a store and my sister saw me and was all excited that I'd gotten my book published. She exclaimed, "Aren't you telling everybody about the book?" The man who I'd been conversing with said, "What book?" So I told him the title, Small Town Therapist's Red Hot Tips. Over in the corner of the store was a friend who'd overheard, sort of. He called over and said, "Red Hot Therapist?" We all laughed. I quickly repeated the correct title. In a small town that wasn't an unusual interaction.  Funny and joyful. Amen to small towns.

*If you'd like to obtain a copy of the book go to barnesandnoble.com and search for the title, Small Town Therapist's Red Hot Tips. 

SMALL TOWN THERAPIST ON CREATIVITY

In our dear county sometimes things change. People can be persuaded that nonsense is sensible, if you get my drift. It's the A with the I. In this post I will be curving a new verbal path that might require some translation but I am confident that my intelligent, kind and good readers will catch that drift, slide into it and enjoy it.

 Some people, who are not men, believe that men are the heads of the household and make all the decisions. That's fine except when said persons are in a very high position in---rhymes with--- the cream fort. Then some people also found that another person in the fort...is a-- rhymes with-- fire.  The fallout was goodbye to-- rowing your own personal boat. The sad truth is many of us worked long and hard for many years to get that-- rhymes with-- saw, passed for women's---rhymes with-- kites. ( See the picture below of two noble women in their nineties who fought the good fight.) Now it's possibly farewell to the "Affectionate Car Act," AKA Yourmama Care.  Please forget about your concerns about the-- rhymes with-- worth. The laws protecting the land, water, air, animals and us, are being-- rhymes with-- hut. Is this what all voters want for our future generations? Personally, I'm rather fond of our public lands, clean air and clean water.

Louise and Lee faithful heroes to all women, and people
and their rights

Currently, we are now getting a refresher course on when-- rhymes with-- proportion was illegal. In the old days, women--- rhymes with-- fried in attempts to end a pregnancy and that is sometimes the situation today. The women, and sometimes very young girls, in states where is no-- rhymes with-- proportion, have no choice to safely save themselves.  Where is our protection for equal rights under the law? That's the 14th Amendment to our constitution.

Let's reverse roles. Wonder if women were--rhymes with--tool, had the power of a cream fort behind them.  The husband comes to his wife and says, "I've been diagnosed with---rhymes with --humors.  Can I please get an operation to free myself from worry and pain?" The 'not man' coolly appraises him and says, "NO, that might interfere with my right to have more babies. Let nature take it's course!" That's the position all 'not men', were in until 1973 when they won the right to have a say over their own bodies. The right to privacy with their physician was a hard fought battle. Now in many states it's still a very hard fought battle. Don't give up!

Another truth: as we've seen---rhymes with--self-lightous people standing outside the-- proportion clinics, waving signs, harassing women. Ah, but where are these--rhymes with--bias, people when that child is born? They're no where to be found. Help that woman, or girl? They declare is not their problem. In fact, the R's are busy eliminating the very programs designed to help any mother and child. This is deemed necessary from the R 2025 Project, to generate more "American" births, you know, the ones the who are--rhymes with---sight. 

These people are actually only pro birth, not pro child. Couldn't we agree to shift the responsibility. WHO got that woman/girl pregnant? 

On that topic of men, especially young men, I had some experience with disseminating information about birth control. Many years ago (in the 1980s)  I was asked to talk to teens about the dangers involved with drugs and alcohol. Fortunately for me, this was well before the very dangerous drugs were in the high schools. Inevitably, the subject of girls drinking to excess would come up. Some boy would smirk and I would lead the discussion about the the responsibility of boys having, or attempting to have, sex with an impaired--rhymes with--hunk, girl. What about responsibility of possible impregnation? That certainly is one of the consequences of having unprotected sex. What about--rhymes with--cape?  I surprised them by stating the lowest incidence of teen pregnancies in the world-- at that time--- was in Japan. Also, at that time, the only form of birth control in Japan was the condom.  A hush fell in the room.  All those years ago no one, to my knowledge, was willing to speak to the obvious: it's clearly not just the woman who can do birth control, Japan proved that.

We need a refresher course in creating empathy in our country. Denmark does this and it's highly successful and it starts in childhood. That used to be the American way. Now there's people attempting to justify---rhymes with--caseism, ignoring the grossly unfair advantages given to people of wealth and allowing women, minorities and people of color to be discriminated against and even removed from this country. Empathy? None.

How I wish we had voted the rascals out! It is unbelievable that some in the country are  siding with the 'wanna be'--- rhymes with--- fixtator.  Do we really have to fall so much further. With the Democrats we mostly had hope, kindness, fairness and competence. That said, never doubt we can rise again. This country can become, again, the admired country. Remember, it was constant protests in the late 1960s and early 1970's that stopped the war in Vietnam. We took to the streets. 

Right now, we are as a country, very concerned about our new "leaders" who have a 'reverse Robinhood' philosophy. "There's nothing surer the rich get richer and the poor get poorer."

 

Don't just sit there, join a group, take to the streets, protest and fight for Democracy. 

susansmagicfeather 2025  Susan R. Grout all rights reserved

 I got inspired to write this post when I read that Lee had died just a year after Louise had died. These two admirable women lived in our small town for more than fifty years and they were active participants in the fights for truth, justice and the American way. How we loved their spunk and wisdom. They were first in line to help get good people elected and worked hard to urge all people to vote.

SMALL TOWN THERAPIST ON TWO WOMEN WHO FOUGHT THE GOOD FIGHT

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