Why I'm Not Allowed to Write a Cookbook

Eating is best when surrounded by family

The reasonable woman adapts herself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to herself. Therefore all progress depends upon the unreasonable woman.                                                 George Bernard Shaw

You will do foolish things, but do them with enthusiasm.                    Colette

Cooking is a daring adventure each time I enter the kitchen. It is, I am quite sure, less exciting an undertaking for those who cook by actually following a recipe. Cowards! My way is to create, with enthusiasm, with whatever I have on hand. Rarely to never do I drive to town for an ingredient, I simply don't make that dish or wait until the next day. My family is use to my oft used phrase, "eat up because I'm not sure I can create this again." I want to defend my right to cook this way and to acknowledge that I should be ashamed of myself for having so little discipline. It's just that things turn out so well most of the time and that it keeps me flamboyant in the kitchen. I figure I know better, faster and with fewer steps than Cook's Illustrated.  How conceited can you get! 

He/she was bold that first ate an oyster.                                             Jonathan Swift

Although I grew up in a restaurant family it was, after all the 1950's and bland was the model of the day. Everyone was all excited about instant meals a la TV dinners and instant mashed potatoes. Chop Suey was exotic although technically isn't even Chinese. The first time I ever even tasted pizza was at a neighbor's house and I disgraced myself reaching for a fourth piece. They all laughed but I couldn't help it. It was so unusual and delicious. That day a gourmand was born and a curiosity about foods from other countries.

Although America was having a love affair with the mediocre, the incredible contrast were the meals brought home from our restaurant-- always exquisite. It was not unusual to have an entire slab of filet Mignon in the fridge and you could just slice off a hunk and have a delightful sandwich. Oh, to have it now.

When Mom was in the mood, in between slaving away on the six kids, she really was an excellent cook. Pot roasts, chili concarne, stews--- okay, it was a bit heavy on the beef, but no complaints here, it was great. She knew how to make a flavorful, perfect gravy that still has no parallel.

As for me lately, my greatest triumphs tend to be sweet: cookies, cakes and pies. In fact at the pot luck group it was decreed that I wasn't allowed to bring anything but dessert. They all grumble when I'm not there and haven't called ahead to warn them of the missing treat.

Here is the disclosure as to why I am not allowed to write a cookbook: it is because I carelessly fling ingredients into the bowl.  Then, worse, I always taste the raw batter and wing it from there. Does it seem dry? Is it too sweet? Does it lack pizazz? Then I re fling more ingredients to make the taste just right. Obviously this doesn't work too well with instructions. Some might say that's silly, I could quantify, but call me unreasonable but I'm not going to stop and scrupulously measure each little thing that goes into my recipe. After all, wasn't it Julia Child who showed us that the cupped palm of your hand held about one teaspoon? I not only follow that advice but I take it to the next level, a pinch of herbs, some extra chocolate, several more tablespoons of butter--- you see, hopeless.

My granddaughter and I with the homemade treats for the soccer team

I have a ridiculous number of cookbooks [35? 50?] and have tried unsuccessfully to weed them down. I'm thinking of putting stickers on them and if I haven't used them in one year, out they go. Now, you're probably wondering "why on earth does she need cookbooks if she's disobedient about following their instructions?" The answer: I get inspiration from them and read them like they're novels. So if in the future of this blog I do write down any recipes, remember they are subject to tasting and adjusting. And if you can't bear to taste raw dough, well I do find that reasonable or sensible but I'll think you lack guts.

susansmagicfeather copyright 2012 Susan R. Grout all rights reserved