SMALL TOWN THERAPIST ON OUR SOCIAL SECURITY INSURANCE

 Today I got a letter in the mail "Dear Medicare enrollee," which claimed that our President was generously giving me $90. What a laugh! The money was basically stolen from our Social Security Insurance fund. This is to prove he cares about about us. Ha! Everyone who reads knows we're going to be hit by the One Big Beautiful Bill, AKA the "Big Bilking Bill"* that congress foolishly passed nearly two years ago. This bill cuts over $1Trillion from health programs, the largest cuts in our countries history. 10 million will lose their health insurance coverage.  Another $120 billion was slashed from t he SNAP program reducing food assistance for low-income families. But he's "giving  us $90." I honestly expect that the real reason was to deplete the SSI funds and then suggest we privatize it. 

Do you believe he cares? Do I even have to ask? What we are witnessing is the cruelty of the current administration. Trump admitted and he said doesn't care, in front of one of his rallies in Texas. He blatantly doesn't care about people's money problems. He's got his fortune from crypto currency and that's all that matters. Narcissism meets and embraces greed.

Remember, this is the bill that gave tax cuts to billionaires, like the immigrant Elon Musk who's paid no taxes. Musk joyfully made these mean and insane DOGE cuts. This only exacerbated the huge financial hole this country is facing. Oh and BTW some of the qualified people that he fired have either sued or gotten their jobs back because they are needed. DOGE was a cruel and dreadful mistake.

Just wait for January, this is when you'll see your new bill from Medicare. Trust me, you'll be appalled at how much more it's going to cost you for health care. Every month you'll be paying 1% more than your previous bill because of the cuts. Then beneficiaries will have higher monthly premiums, also reduced services, because the programs that assisted low income seniors with premiums and drug costs, have been postponed until 2034. Are you paying attention? So he throws our 90 whole dollars at us as though that would help. No sir, were about to be hit with that catastrophic BBBill*. What a joke, Republicans and this administration are only helping the 1%. Congress, and specifically the Republicans, let this happen.

Here's the information on who is not eligible for Medicare with the new bill:   

• refugees and people granted asylum
• people with temporary protected status
• survivors of human trafficking
• survivors of domestic violence 
• individuals granted humanitarian parole.    

Please pay attention to who is being disallowed. For example, those in the "human trafficking" and "domestic violence" groups.  Doesn't this seem suspicious to you? This is probably more than 90% women who have been trafficked and also mostly women who have been victims of domestic violence. Misogynism reigns supreme in the current White House. DOGE,(headed by Musk) was part of creating the draconian cuts. This is a man who has said of his many wives that they are "just breeders." Our own President and many big shot billionaires have specific knowledge of these two groups of women. They should be ashamed of themselves.  

What's with the delays of the Epstein Files? Aren't we all eagerly awaiting repercussions for the male participants who abused these girls as reported in the unredacted Epstein Files? Rumor has it that those files, in entirety and unredacted, are available in some places in Europe. Send them! Please let justice be served for the victims, the survivors of rape and abuse.

                  

These women have suffered greatly. As our own statue of Liberty proud proclaims "give me your tired and your poor," and the current administration ignores suffering. The ones trafficked have been severely abused as well as the survivors of domestic violence. We used to be a kind and generous country and we could be again. We need to throw out the ones who have failed us so miserably. Vote blue because we would never ignore those who are in need.

I'm sending my $90 to Democratic candidates and Planned Parenthood today.

susansmagicfeather 2026 Susan R. Grout

SMALL TOWN THERAPIST ON VIGILANCE AND VIGILANTE

 

All over the news are the names of the young men from Cornell who raped a women, a classmate in their college. Then we learned about the absurd "punishment"--- they were required to write an essay about their experience. This was supposed to be equal to the potentially life long pain they caused this young woman. BTW who is paying for her very necessary counseling to help her reclaim her dignity and her body? I read that she asked for a refund from Cornell because she didn't want to ever see her rapists again. Cornell refused her refund. 

Who is insisting that the schools across the country to start giving classes about the devastation caused from abusive behavior by men? Oh, I forgot, one of those lessons is-- if you are rich there may be no consequences. The current administration has withheld the sadly redacted Epstein Files.  So far there's no justice in sight for the victims of repetitive rape, including girls as young as 12.  When is this soul crushing behavior going to stop?

This got me thinking about all the hundreds of thousand of women who get raped every year in our country. Where are our protectors? God knows every woman in this country is constantly vigilant, worried  daily for herself, her daughters, her nieces and her friends. Ironically, this administration is trying, unsuccessfully, to make us fear trans people, gay people or Drag Queens. Women must loudly say, "no they are not the problem." Most unfortunately we women justifiably fear being attacked by men and even high school boys. The sad statistic is almost 450, 000 rapes occur per year and then the bad news continues, an estimated 300 thousand are harmed by sexual assault. Only 25% of these assaults are reported to the police. After bravely reporting the rape, how seriously do the police pursue these rapists? Some police even dismiss the reporting by the survivor. This is apparently is what happened to the young woman  raped by the Cornell 7.

My question to all of you is this: why are women being victimized when they/we could have protection? Any mother who's sent her daughter off to college or a new business needs to feel as though the school, the businesses have her daughter's safety in mind. I like the notion of helper groups or even vigilante groups of men willing to protect women. I believe that there some groups of men in the country who are trying to do this.

Actually there are groups of volunteer men 

•  Naples, Fl. ---Gentlemen Against Domestic Violence. These good men volunteer to raise awareness and educate the public about domestic violence and support emergency safe houses.    
• Hartford, Connecticut---The Men's Initiative. This organization aims to bring  awareness of the horror of domestic violence on families. They reach out to local leaders, first responders and volunteers across the region. 
• Gurnee Il. ---Up to Men's Initiative. They help their local "A Safe Place" by educating their community about violence reduction. 

There's an organization called Futures without Violence lead by Esta Soler who in 1994 was among the key advocates for a U.S. law to combat the devastating effects of domestic violence. They have a program that sounds perfect "Coaching Boys into Men."

Here's an idea: how about bands of men in every community come together to volunteer to help women feel safe? Isn't that fairly obvious? For example, in rough neighborhoods there should be male guards accompanying any woman. Men could volunteer to walk with the women in high crime areas. This would not only help the women and children but also the police departments.  I'm hoping for awareness by the men of the U.S. that they, in good conscience, need to help women in danger.

Most often in cities and towns, it's the ill funded Domestic Violence groups across the country who are trying to raise awareness of the plague of domestic violence. I know because I helped start the local Volunteers Against Violence in our small community in 1978. Mostly women joined the organization--but we sure could have used more men to help protect the abused women and girls. We do have a small but mighty Stand Up Men! group in our community. They are at the courthouse lawn with their banner and signs every Friday for an hour raising awareness about domestic violence.  They even marched in our 4th of July parade. Let's hope that this latest rape brings about a sea change. Hopefully, everyone must understand the devastating after effects of violence. Rape is soul crushing.

Instead of the current use of ICE by this administration which  actually has condoned and allowed killing our citizens, couldn't they be re- made into a force to protect our citizens? Look at the statistics. By and large statistically it's white men who are responsible for most of the rapes and shootings. Unlike ICE today, who does practically no vetting of their hires, there must be serious screening of the men and women to act as our protectors.  Obviously this is a pipe dream of mine, but it could be well worth it, if it reduces the number of victims in the country. 

My idea came from the fact that all men have mothers. Therefore all men could be eligible, to be on a rotation, to protect women. They wouldn't even have to write an essay! They could sign up to help or be on call at the local Domestic Violence and Sexual Assault office or the sheriff's department. Next they would be given a background check. I foresee they'd be under obligation to protect us, as little as twice a year. Why not? If men are causing the problem, certainly they can help fix it.

Of course, all men in the world owe a huge debit of gratitude to the women who gave birth to them. Remember this men, once that seed is planted intra utero, we the mothers, assemble all the parts of your bodies--- inside our bodies!  Yes, that includes your penis. You owe us devotion, and because you are bigger, your help as our protectors. So join the Stand Up Men! The Up to Men's Indicative,  The Gentlemen Against Domestic Violence! or the Lovable Vigilantes! (I made that up). Be of assistance! 

Who would be appropriate as good companions in my vigilante group? I would be delighted to have Drag Queens, gay guys and trans people. What a cheerful group that would be! A lively, raucous group assisting me or any other terrified woman down a dark alley! I know it sounds fanciful but it just might be an important step to curbing or lowering the incidence of rape. We need to do something---so why not make it festive.

As for women entering colleges, sports clubs, businesses,  fraternities, study clubs etc. there should be mandatory rules  insisting inappropriate behavior will not be tolerated. Everyone can help prevent assault on women. The assigned guards could be watching out for the women on campus. Put these men to good use. 

I have never been good at being silent when faced with injustice. I am baffled by people who remain silent when they know an injustice is blatantly out there. Speak up! This could prevent harming more women and children. We need to vote in people who are concerned and care about the rights of women, not the ones who are actively taking away our rights.  Also, when you vote, remember people of color need our support. Many are being thrown in concentration camps without due process. Where is the Life, Liberty, and Pursuit of Happiness in that? Please help. Be a Stand Up Man or Woman to prevent abuse.

susansmagicfeather 2026 Susan R. Grout 

Dolly Appreciation Day

The reason I wrote a post in April about Dolly, (SMALL TOWN THERAPIST ON WHY I'D RATHER HAVE DOLLY,  APRIL 4TH )was because I wanted to sent my love and admiration to Dolly Parton for many reasons. Glad I did now that she has died. I'm glad I said what I had to say, which most people are saying---how much I loved her. 

First and foremost, I greatly admire Dolly's incredible charity work, still do. This is a woman who has single handedly given away billions and most of it to little children though the Dollywood Foundation. This charity of Dolly's focuses on education and literacy with the Imagination Library. That organization gives books to parents with children under 5 years old. What an invaluable gift! This is just part of the good work Dolly has done, every day since 1988. You got to love and admire a woman who loves people over accumulating vast fortunes.

Probably many of us have forgotten that Dolly contributed millions to the COVID-19 vaccine research and disaster relief. I am still grateful. I was very worried about all of us over 70 years old, it seemed that that disease was coming for us. Many older folks were dropping like flies and especially the medical establishment was desperate and crying for help from this terrible plague. Most of the  deaths occurred in the South, where there's high poverty rates, limited access to quality food and little health care available. Into the disaster came Dolly with her generous contribution to the research that came up with the vaccine. Thank you team Dolly!

Sadly the current administration has it's emphasis on funding a stupid war, cutting services and monies for the poor, and enhancing the billionaires of the world.  I believe the current administration is purposely bilking our treasury, leaving us in horrific debt and this is against the law and our constitution. We the people demand a refund! Do I believe T and his minions will dutifully pay back the money they've swiped? No I do not.

Get up Stand Up, Stand Up for Your Rights!    Bob Marley 1973

I wish we had more Dolly's, Oprah's, Taylor's and MacKenzie's in our current government and in the world. We need kindness, decency, enlightenment and generosity in all governments. Sadly, instead we have completely unqualified people in our administration. An example would be RFK and his band of misguided anti-science people, out to eliminate vaccines. After our lesson from being unprepared for the COVID pandemic, why allow people to believe that vaccines are scary and harmful?  Take measles, please! 2,800 cases currently in the U.S. Sad but true. 92% caused by lack of vaccines. 

Let's celebrate Dolly with song and spirit. We're meeting at our courthouse in Friday Harbor this Saturday to protest but also to spread the joy of music. Dolly and Bob Marley would be proud. Join us!

susansmagicfeather 2026 Susan R. Grout

SMALL TOWN THERPIST ON BEING ENOUGH

Sisters and nieces at guitar camp

 

Kathy Bullock has a 4 octave range 

I just returned home from guitar camp and although exhausted from a boat load of fun, I'm still reveling in the joy of the gathering. There's nothing that can compare to the greatness of singing in four part harmony with a group of like minded people. Glorious is the word that comes to mind.

Another word that comes to my mind, and perhaps yours sometimes, is "enough."  One of my tragic flaws is I believe I can never be enough or do enough. I strive, oh how I strive, to do and be enough. But, somehow I feel I always fall short. One of the lessons I brought home with me is the song "Enough" and I am repeating "I am enough" to myself. Right now I'm filled with joy! 

This revelation came about with the help of one of our music teachers, the magnificent Dr. Kathy Bullock of Kentucky. Kathy led two classes. One was 'Gospel' songs and the other class the 'Songs of Freedom.' Kathy taught us to breathe properly, to reach our notes with our breath and to opened our mouths wide. What a force of power!  Internally and externally for me and all the class members. 

What's amusing is when I think of the word enough, and think of little children and infants, it never occurs to me to think "are they enough?" So where did this start for me? If this is one of your flaws, where did it start for you?

As many of you who have read my book remember I am one of six kids in my family. My mother at times was overwhelmed and didn't have the temperament for a large family. Blame the mother. Well, not quite. My Dad was a restauranteur and worked ridiculous long hours to keep the restaurant afloat and successful and wasn't home often to help our mom. Blame the father. I was second oldest of six and I was really good a worrying about my mom and dad. Blame myself. 

"One's task is not to turn the world upside down, but to do what is necessary...with due consideration of reality."                                      Dietrich Bonhoffer

Here's a partial list of how to solve the problem of constant worrying.

1. Reassign anxiety as excitement to give you extra energy.

2. Learn to read your body signals, for example---slow your breath, exhale or sing.

3. Live fearlessly every day, ask yourself what's the worse that can happen? If that is scary, can you ask for help?

4. Imagine a good outcome. 

5. Use the serenity prayer, or realize there are things in your control and out of your control.

6. Distract yourself with a good friend, especially the ones who are funny.

7. Go for a walk outside, hug a pet, do some reflective writing, take a shower or bath, and listen to music.

8. Work on letting go, last time I checked I wasn't a goddess, I learned some things are completely out of my control.

9. Be kind to yourself, the ancient human brain is wired for fear--- to be alert for predators. 

9. Train the brain, to be supportive and soothing, "we'll be fine." Have mercy for yourself.

10. Always be aware and amused about your life and the world. Oh yes, swearing helps.

Because of our over scheduled, high pressure society, especially now, daily dark troublesome news, people can be in a constant state of alarm. Do your best, with what you have, for who you are....or something like that.

Have mercy for yourself.

Having joy with sisters and nieces at guitar camp

Personally I want to sing every day!  I want it to always be 75 degrees and sunny and have the lovely rain showers only at night! I want every child to be given a kind and loving home and the end to poverty! I want the end to war! I want all my family and friends to remain healthy and never die! Well, that was fun. I can do the singing every day part. 

When Kathy sang the song "Enough" to us on the last day of class, every single one of us was reduced to tears. At one point someone started passing around toilet paper and a roll of that toilet paper came sailing across the room to a young woman who was trying to stifle her tears. We laughed uproariously. It was a loving class that I will never forget. I'm so grateful.

Actually, that's my job--- to love. Every day get out there and love. Kathy Bullock raised the temperature of that love in the class and I want to spread that joy. I am enough and so are you.

susansmagicfeather   Susan R. Grout 2026 

   

SMALL TOWN THERAPIST ON INJUSTICE AND DEFECTS OF CHARACTER

 

These days when we have thugs murdering our citizens in the streets of Illinois, Maine and Minnesota I keep asking myself, when will it end? By that I mean all the cruelty and illegality of this administration.

I'm positive I'm not alone in being horrified that ICE has murdered our people--- brown people, white people with no repercussions. How is that possible in this country? Laws in this current administration are shamefully ignored, with no consequences. The people nominated for important positions in the cabinet either equivocate or out right lie so that they can attain a position of power. The Republicans are okay with this but anyone who can read is appalled at their disregard of truth and the law. Why is this happening? Simply put they are cowards. 

When the Trump administration announced in 2024 that they would get rid of the worst of the worst what they really meant was they would showcase the worst of the worst. They brought in thugs into our neighborhoods, ill prepared (mostly) men who were in it for the pay and the joy of bulling our citizens. They frightened all they encountered and consider that is their right. Who does this remind you of? What era does this bring to mind? If you are a person of color you might respond, "this era, we have always had thugs trying to intimidate us." If you are white this might be something that's never happened to you, masked men pulling guns in your face. If you are a person of color there has always been wrongful imprisonment. For white people this was a rare occurrence. What is ironic to me is we could fill all those detention facilities with horrible men, pedophiles, straight from the Epstein files, right now. This would  be justice. Let them be treated like the criminals and the reprehensible men that they are. Instead we gave them tax breaks. 

Obviously, with the latest ridiculous announcements from the White House, T claims yet again that he did win the 2020 election. Please don't laugh. He's now trying to capture the country by erasing the November mid term elections. Do, please, fight for our right to continue to have honest elections. I'm hoping you will fight to keep America sane. Dementia cannot, should not, be running this country.

It used to be that we could rely on the Supreme Court to back our good citizens up and they would stand for "NO person is above the law." Well they, some of them, have sold their souls. Many believe that they are just products of the Heritage foundation who wants the country to be white Christian Nationals. What happened to the separation of Church and State?

We need everyone of us who loves this country, "home of the free, no child left behind, give me your tired and your poor," to stand up and say "don't your dare take away my right to vote!" Talk bravely to your friends, families and neighbors, even the ones who claim to be apolitical and urge them to vote. Remember 93 million people chose not to vote in the last election. Urge them to think of kindness in their voting habit, after all we have been living under a very careless, cruel and greedy regime and it's got to stop.                    

 

  
susansmagicfeather 2026 

Small Town Therapist on the 4th of July Parade

Come join the Democrats in the 4th of July Parade!  Here are some old pictures of the past 4th celebration. Our dance troupe won first prize.

The real name was "We've Got Balls" dance troupe

The glory of our enthusiastic, proud Americans

Ok, we didn't always pick the winner but always had fun

The details will come on 3rd of July. By that time we will know when and where to line up for the parade. Please let me know if you can march with us. Just reply below or leave me a message. 

Thanks!

SMALL TOWN THERAPIST ON FAMILY AND SAVED LETTERS

 

Zach can be fun, at our Mom's Memorial

Zach's family ten years ago

The letters in my files were from the sons who were starting their lives after college. Our oldest son, Zach was a man of few words. During college in one letter he requested funds for something he was interested in doing. After the request for money he said, "I realize that you'd like to hear more but..." So be it. It made me chuckle. Zach, since that era, has frequently written very lovely cards for mother's day, father's day and birthdays to me and my husband. Always a treat.

Josh, years ago, holding his newborn son

Our son Josh went fishing in Alaska after college and vividly described the beauty and many experiences that fishers have. In one adventure, he was wrestling with 60 pound salmon in precarious weather. He described other indelible scenes like fishing with humpback whales for company. Other  stories were tales of his travels after college. Josh reported absolutely hair raising events---like the mother-shocking-incidents he described in Greece, involving a huge motorcycle he rented. He took to riding around the twisty, dangerous Greek roads at top speed. He was 6,000 miles away and there was nothing we could do about our terror here at home. Besides, by the time the letters arrived, he was on to his next adventure. 

The award for most letters written to me were the tender, love filled letters written by my mother and when he retired also from my dad. Interestingly, mom in real life was not all that demonstrative or cuddly, but on paper she would express her deep feelings, love, encouragement and sometimes fears for me. Our mother was widowed at 65 years and the shock reverberated off the page of how she was left to forge ahead after their 44 years marriage. I felt saddened yet honored to receive her outpourings of grief. Now I know how truly young 65 was and discovered how loving and tender was her relationship to my father. Interestingly, mom became much more fun to be around after she picked herself up from the hard work of grieving. She then became the funny, outspoken woman she always was. Turns out she was overshadowed by my very charismatic father.

WWII airplanes in New Orleans museum

Sally's and Trisha's packets of letters that they took home after Mom's memorial, contained the letters written in WWII from our Dad to our Mom. They were filled with his passionate love and longing for our mother. Dad was stationed in the "worst theater in the Pacific---Okinawa." He never let on that this was his nightmare experience. Instead he told us far fetched tales. He claimed he "dug latrines for two years." Instead of depression, fear and anguish, his letters were filled with humorous incidences and the comical people he'd met in the Navy. My father and mother were truly just a little bit affectionate and never overtly demonstrative with their love in front of us. What a treat it was for all of us to hear how deeply smitten Dad was for our mother! Oh, how our mother cherished those letters. And now we get to be delighted with these hand written missives.

The sisters

My sisters have been well represented in these folders, with years of outpouring of love and affection. You should envy me for having such talented, smart and devoted sisters. All of us have written many songs and two of us have written books, soon to be three of us. Especially in our early twenties and thirties when raising out children we would reach out by mail. Many of you will laugh at this but back in the day the telephone was a luxury and a call expensive to those who didn't have fortunes. Letters were a necessity if you wanted to keep in touch. And oh the tales and surprises and grief and joy that would come  in an envelope. My sisters most lovingly expressed their thoughts on what was current in their lives. The best ones were funny, and always loving, supportive and complementary. I do love these sisters.

My Niece, my sister missing from the above picture, my nephew, and three grandnieces

Among the letters to my husband and I, were from our lovely niece. These letters described her family of four's adventures in Taiwan. We missed this little family and especially the little girls. It was delightful to reread them all. We were overjoyed when the Hu McClure family decided to settle on our island. Great company! 

Granddaughter holding a letter

Friends enjoying a letter

I cherish so many of these letters that I can today hold in my hand and laugh or weep over. It's both touching and beautiful. I have decided to start writing letters to my family once a month just because. I'm hoping some of these letters will be eventually meaningful for them. If I hear back that's fine but what I truly desire is that my family gets to hold something in their hand that pours forth my love.  These real feelings just aren't the same when expressed in an email or text. It takes a piece of paper to make it literally more tangible and enduring.

Give the old lady a thrill, write
 

susansmagicfeather 2026 Susan R. Grout

SMALL TOWN THERAPIST ON RAISING SONS

The best letter writer by far was my mom

 I found this old blog post that I'd never finished. It inspired me to write. It also started me on the road to purging some old files.  Ah, but I'm sentimentalist and saved many letters and cards from my entire family for many moons. I'm not alone in this project. My mom was a secret sentimentalist and saved our drawings and some of my letters from camp at Lake Windego. "Dear Mom, all the other kids get letters every day and I get none! Write soon..." Okay, I was 10 years old and, in her defense, she had five kids at home.

After she died in 2010,  we had a grand memorial. Rather than sitting around, my siblings and I cleaned up her "aerie." We found so many little treasures and a vast amount of letters she saved. We decided to split up the many letters and each of us six kids took home a packet that contained letters, drawings and pictures. Our job was to read, or save, or toss.

For the past several hours I've had the pleasure and privilege of going through three big files of family letters, including my share of the packet of letters that mom saved. Reading these treasures from our families' combined history found me sometime in tears, sometimes laughing. Truly, most of the time I spent thinking about the family member and then missing the authors of these delightful missives. In my packet there were letters to my mom filled with gratitude from all of us. We told tales of ordinary life pleasures, like the joy of raising little ones, perils of raising sons, the funny things that small children do and the delightful events of celebrated holidays when we siblings and our families would get together. For many years, none of my siblings and I had much money and we lived great distances apart. So those letters back and forth were cherished.

The favorite letter that my mom saved from me was written in the '80's. I had to read it aloud to my husband who needed to share in the... joy? From the letter:

My mentor Laurie and I were asked to speak at conference in Victoria on the subject of 'Children of Alcoholics.' This was quite a thrill and we got a stand ovation. That was about all we got for our speech...except, they paid for our hotel rooms. Laurie took her son Tyghe and I had Zach and Josh with me, the boys got their own room. Since we were going to be without a car, we asked to stay in Victoria proper, and oh, was that a mistake. We were right in the thick of the bar district during the full moon and the day the unemployment checks came in the mail. Grown men howled from 10pm until 2am, revved their cars and had fist fights approximately right under our window.  At about 1 a.m. I hear this drunk yelling up "jump! jump!" and piercing the night, over the din below comes a recognizable voice saying, "How much will you give me?" It was Joshua. I furious and indignant. I leapt out of bed, rushed down to the boys room to find him leaning out the window, pleasantly bantering with the scene below. Naturally I lost it, and growled all kinds of reproachment to the boy. His reply? "You didn't say we couldn't." True, one doesn't think to tell the children, "Now don't yell out the window to the drunks..."

The next day when I was only slightly less angry I said to Josh, "If you think I got angry last night imagine what your Dad would have done." To which  he answered, adding insult to injury, "If Dad was here I never would have done it."

Several paragraphs later in the letter: "We are now well and fine. However, Thursday night Zach was jumping on a trampoline and hurt himself badly enough that he had trouble driving home. I put him in a hot bath...and he almost passed out. Our neighbor (he's an EMT) came over on his tractor and said he couldn't see any damage but we decided to take Zach to the doctor the next day. Meanwhile Dick is picking up Josh and his friend from school. When driving down the road, suddenly a shot rings out. The rear passenger window is shot out and Josh starts yelling in pain. D not knowing what's going on, turns the car around and roars to the Sheriff's department. Fortunately Josh is more scared than hurt, but the window crumbles, as temper glass will, and falls into our brand new car. Josh had quite the bruise and fortunately we were taking Josh to an Orthopedist the next day for his knees.  After the cortisone shots in his knees, I had Dr. Woo look at the pellet bruise on his back and while he was at it, examine Zach's muscle on his back. Pellet wound for Josh and pulled muscle for Zach. Quite sincerely at the end of the doctor visit, Dr. Woo looks and me and says, "You don't have any more sons I hope."

Happily our sons matured and through the years we've gotten many wonderful cards, phone calls and even letters that I cherish from our sons.

I have an idea, would you consider indulging me and writing any funny stories of raising your sons or daughters. I'd love it and believe everyone needs a good laugh.

Give the old lady a thrill, write 

susansmagicfeather 2026 

SMALL TOWN THERAPIST ON CHANCE ENCOUNERTS

Spring flowers on Mt. Young

 It seems that sometimes serendipity is floating in the air. It's hard to prove this phenomena and yet I try. Some scoff (behind my back) and some just look at me curiously. But here's a few examples of recent little surprises that have delighted me.

My husband and I went for a walk up Mt. Young and when we got to the top along came a party of 10 hikers. My husband heard and noticed that one of the young women in the group had a pronounced brogue. He asked her where she was from. "I'm from Ireland, as is my sister over there." "That's so nice that you've arrived on this lovely spring day." I said. They told us, "We were in Vancouver for a half marathon," she explained, "and we decided to come to the states and see your beautiful island." Then she mentioned, "The rest of us are from Australia and England."  We chatted for a while and then the woman with the lovely brogue noticed that my husband's T shirt had a logo on the front from Lahinch Surf Shop. She exclaimed, "Where did you get that shirt?" and my husband said, "This was my good friend Brad's shirt, he bought it in Ireland when he and his wife traveled there many years ago. His wife gave away, at Brad's memorial, all the many shirts Brad collected from their travels."  Another woman said, "I know that shop it's on the west side of Ireland near where I live!" He then turned around to show the back of the shirt with a huge logo of Lahinch Surf Shop. They proceeded to take pictures of the back of his shirt. We all laughed at the coincidence and then we talked about Ireland and added that my husband's grandfather was born there as was my grandmother, Gertrude Byrne. One of the young woman in the group said that Byrne was her last name. I said, "You never know, we could be relatives, ha." We then told them where some of the bright spots were on our island and pointed the way to a good restaurant that they might enjoy. We left and went down to our car. I positively glowed with appreciation of the tiny special things that can happen in an ordinary day in May.

Interestingly, a couple of years ago--- in that exact same spot, we had a similar occurrence. We hiked, with my brother and sister-in-law Jim and Colleen, up to the top of Mt. Young.  We were telling them, how one of the men on the island, who is in his 90's, hikes up there every day. That amazed them, but nothing compared to what came next. Up walked the nonagenarian who we were just talking about!  He pleasantly greeted us and by the way, he was not out of breath. We introduced our travelers from Vermont and our friend said, "Oh, I lived in Vermont many years ago." They exchanged pleasantries about that beautiful state when he added, "I started the Killington Ski Resort." It just so happens that our nephew lives several miles from that ski resort and skis there all the time. It was kind of jaw dropping experience and again, a delight.

The last little tale happened a couple of weeks ago. I'd been working on a booklet for our grandson which I filled with stories from his birth to his soon to be graduation. I went to the marvelous printshop on the island to pick the booklet up which now had been bound, at long last. It was months in the creating and rendering and I was quite pleased with all of the pictures that I'd found to accompany the text. (It pays to keep journals!) I was walking out of the printshop, 

Silas and Lulu at Train Town

with the results of my efforts, so pleased and smiling with the little booklet in my hand. Then I got a call on my phone, it was the soon to be graduate, Silas.  What's interesting is that, to my knowledge, Silas had never called me before. We'd talked via FaceTime many times but the calls were always initiated by us. I was thrilled about the timing and answered enthusiastically. "Silas! What an incredible coincidence! I just finished picking up something I wrote for you..." "Yeah, yeah," he said, "I just need your address to send you a graduation announcement." He was so unimpressed by the marvelous timing and serendipity of the call. I am still tickled by him and his casual response.  We did manage to have a nice talk about his life at school, who he was dating and his classes.

I guess what I'd like to underline with an exclamation point is that life can surprise you, delight you and leave you hugging yourself with the chance encounters.

Be aware and amused at all times, it brings sparks of joy to unusual encounters.

Twins visiting: surprise!

susansmagicfeather 2026 Susan R. Grout

SMALL TOWN THERAPIST ON CHOOSING SIDES

 

The world can feel comfortable and secure if you believe that you've chosen, what you consider to be, the right side. But wonder if that side was based on deceit and lies? Wonder if that side is not interested in your  well being.

I read an article by Danny Westneat in the Sunday Seattle Times. He interviewed shocked farmers who are losing their farms. Westneat stated, "It looks like farmer's are starting to have some buyer's remorse." This is due to their best workers being thrown into detention centers (aka prisons). These workers are good people who never had any marks against them. The farmers were told by the current administration that only "the worst of the worst" were going to be targeted. Then the current administration, T at the helm, said to his constituents, and the ICE people "arrest them all." And they have.

Unfortunately, according to social media, the comments have been very much toward, blame the victim. "You voted for this, work the fields yourself." etc. I wish they had added, "you put your trust in someone who has proven to be deceitful, come join us in the protests against this would be dictator." Blame the victim isn't necessary. They were bamboozled.

Sometimes people put their faith in someone who is found to be unfaithful, someone who is a narcissist and only cares about himself. When I was working in my counseling office I saw many people, especially women, being fooled into thinking that the person that they believed in and chose was worthy of their devotion. Then the beatings started and/or the verbal abuse. It is very difficult to extract yourself from someone you have literally bound yourself to and continue to have hope when "he said never again!" Kapow! It happens again.

Good silly fun

This is the position were are in as a country. Good, decent people believed a chronic liar and the consequences are devastating. He promised that they would have lower prices in the grocery story and at the gas stations. He promised no wars. He promised he'd only deport criminals. Basically he lied on all counts. 

Arrests of undocumented people with no criminal record is up eight fold. They, the farmers, and some MAGA people, chose the wrong side and have regrets, but they also have their dignity. To shame these people is not necessary, making fun of them not a smart tactic if you'd rather have unity. Inflatable frogs and dinosaurs make more sense that hate rhetoric.  My refrain now is come join us! Republicans and MAGA invited. 

People can make a huge difference via elections. This just happened in Hungary who got rid of their dictator, Victor Orban. Orban was at the helm for sixteen years. It took people taking to the streets and shouting for and demanding change and, of course, they voted. The change was a landslide for Peter Magyar who declared "together we overthrew the Hungarian regime, not by a little by by a lot." They got rid of cronyism and corruption. We can too, but we need cooperation by the ones who are bruised. I know in Minneapolis they started singing a song "It's Okay to Change Your Mind." This song was sung to the ICE people. I have no idea if it was effective or not but, what the heck, worth a shot rather than hurling the barrage of hatred which has not worked. I know that people standing together and supporting their neighbors has worked. I also believe brave Governors and mayors around the country have upped the repercussions for ICE by outlawing masks. Then these abusive ICE agents can be prosecuted for assaulting innocent citizens.

Greed and power define this administration

One of the methods that the people in the right wing media have tried to keep those of us who are protesting quiet, is by shaming us for "overreacting" to the current administration's illegal actions. They, Fox News and other right wing outlets, are calling it TDS: Trump Derangement Syndrome. I have a hard time thinking that anyone who is protesting against an unauthorized war is deranged. Isn't that protecting and fighting for the Constitution and the rule of law? Is it deranged to speaking out against T's stealing and bilking, last count, over 1.4 billion from the U.S. people and our programs? Isn't T being in the Epstein files, thousand of times and then lying about it deranged? Isn't T hiring Elon to fire many important government workers and then to decimate many of our vital social agencies deranged?  BTW Elon further enriched himself with government contracts. Finally, what is deranged is anyone going along with a president who you know very well in your gut is nuts. Many have pointed out his dementia and increasingly idiotic statements on his Social Media platform. Ironically, many were angry that Biden wasn't removed from office when he was declining. Trump is not only failing but continues to create havoc even wars! and is also a cruel, sick man. His goal all along was to enrich himself and his family and friends. 

Then he's slashed the many programs for the hungry and the poor. Who, really is deranged? 

We can be effective, passionate and angry with the objective that we are fighting for our Constitution and Truth. We must stand up for goodness, decency and honesty. Chose the side that cares about humanity.

susansmagicfeather 2026 Susan R. Grout all rights reserved

SMALL TOWN THERAPIST ON WHY I'D RATHER HAVE DOLLY

 I feel passionate, as you might have noticed, that we must keep paying attention to what is happening in this country.

I'll get to Dolly, I promise, in a minute.

 

So much of our security, happiness, and stability rests on a robust economy, and also rests on our ability to elect people who actually care that our country is thriving. Do not confuse that with the billionaire class who have proven to be hopelessly addicted to their wealth and the power that goes along side of the money. Do the majority of billionaires care about the average citizen in this country? Sadly no.

 Isn't it hilarious the billionaire class took so many of us in with the notion that the billionaires were actually good for our economy!? That nonsense started in the Regan administration with the 'trickle down theory' which of course was a lie. Regan claimed that the people at the top of the food chain, (at that time they were just lowly millionaires) were going to generously help the working class with higher salaries, robust benefits and 401Ks. Guess what? That didn't happen then and it's certainly not happening now. Instead, cleverly they got many of the citizens in the U.S. to hate thy neighbor, especially those who were black or brown and to denigrate people who were homeless. This was a distraction. As you probably know by now, it was a gigantic ruse to fool people into distrusting the poor, the homeless and to fear the immigrant. Flagrant fiction folks! And what wonderful contribution have the preponderance of the billionaires done for this country? Nada. It's all investing in AI and who gets the benefits of that? Certainly not the working class. It's the very rich.

There are exceptions! There are terrific exceptions to the power and greed addiction. The prize winner of who has donated the most in the shortest time period goes to MacKenzie Scott. She has given away most of her Amazon shares in the past seven years. She hired a team that investigates and then funds worthy causes. She currently funds colleges, schools, LGBTQ+, racial equality, democracy and climate change. Hooray!

Warren Buffet is a fabulous and noteworthy philanthropist who has donated billions over a much longer period of time.

Both of the Gates, Melinda and Bill are important donors, especially in the world where few have given before. 

However, from a Forbes article I read, "women tend to give more faster."

There are lots of women who are quietly giving every single day to people and organizations across the country. One woman I admire is Taylor Swift who gives vast sums of money to Education (Education for Girls), Food Banks, Fire Departments, Feeding America, American Heart Association and $100K to families of shooting victims.  It's said that every town and city that she has performed in has benefited from her generosity. 

Then there is another star: Oprah Winfrey. Her donations are well over $400 million to various causes through her foundation.

Billie Eilish is also at work giving millions away. Plus she famously scolded the billionaires who don't/won't give to good causes. The billionaires are the ones are suffering from a hoarding addiction.

Reading to children is so important

The reason I starting writing this post was because I wanted to sent my love and admiration to Dolly Parton for many reasons. First and foremost I greatly admire Dolly's incredible charity work.  This is a woman who has single handedly given away billions and most of it to little children though the Dollywood Foundation. This charity of Dolly's focuses on education and literacy with the Imagination Library. This is just part of the good work she does, it's been every day since 1988.

Probably many of us have forgotten that Dolly contributed millions to the COVID-19 vaccine research and disaster relief. I am still grateful. I was very worried about all of us over 70 years old. Do you remember in 2020 the older folks were dropping like flies? Most of the  deaths occurred in the South, where there's high poverty rates, limited access to quality food and little health care available. Interesting that the current administration has it's emphasis on funding war, cutting services and monies for the poor while enhancing the billionaires of the world.  I believe that the current administration is purposely bilking our treasury and I know that this is against the law and our constitution. We the people demand a refund! Do I believe T and his minions will dutifully pay back the money they've swiped? No I do not.

 I wish we had some Dolly's, Oprah's, Taylor's and MacKenzie's in our current government. We need kindness, decency, enlightenment and generosity in our government. Sadly, instead we have completely unqualified people in the administration. An example would be RFK and his band of misguided anti-science people, out to eliminate vaccines.  Take measles, please! 1,500 cases currently in the U.S. Sad but true. 92% caused by lack of vaccines. Help us Dolly!

Currently in this administration we have corruption, deceit, incompetence and theft. How is it that most of the administration has made millions of dollars. Where are these funds coming from? I believe it's from bilking our government out of billions. Then they turn around and tell us they don't have money for health care or education. Is there anyone out there who actually believes that's true? What do they have plenty of money for? War! Argentina! Venezuela! Netanyahu! Ballrooms of Gold! Hidden Bank Accounts in Off Shore locations! This is clearly corruption, and addiction to power and greed at it's finest.   

So why did we attack and then kill the very awful leader of Iran? He was a cruel dictator but if you do a simple comparison to our own president:

Very similar but without the turban

.

Happily our country has awakened! We are gathering in the millions, more than 8 million, last count at the NO KINGS  protest held on March 28th across the country. People rose up in a peaceful protest. Not one arrest throughout the protests. We vow to continue until there is a regime change in this country.

Keep up the good trouble for the regime change for our country! Even the Pope in his Holy Week homily has weighed in. He warned that there is no justification for declaring an unjust war. He said to remember "Jesus was a man of peace, love and caring." Those who created this war have done so against the Constitution, the wishes of our people and Congress. They have blood on their hands. 

Be inspire by the brave people of Minnesota, and now the diligent hero's who are spreading truth, love and insistence that we continue to protest until the corrupt ones are gone. Vote them out, show up and, if you can, give to the candidates who will stop the nonsense that's going on in Washington, D.C.

We all can't have Dolly, Taylor and Billie's talent but we can have their business skills, smarts, goodness and generosity. 

susansmagicfeather 2026 all rights reserved Susan R. Grout