Small Town Therapist on Being a Good Sport

When I was pregnant with my first son I applied and had gotten a job with Seattle Parks and Recreation.  My husband and I were graduate students, he was accepted to the Urban Planning department at U of Washington and I'd been accepted at Ryther Children's Center part of the U of Wa. I felt it necessary to tell them I was with child, only two months and I didn't "show". Naturally, true to the times, they rescinded their offer of a graduate school position. I realize today that would never happen, would it? 

So for the interview with Seattle P & R I wised up and kept my mouth shut about the pregnancy and the impending birth. When I did get my courage up and confessed my pregnancy to Seattle P & R they were just glad to have a young woman who could work with the 20 or so Developmentally Disabled "kids" [they were all older than me] enthusiastically. I was particularly qualified having worked with developmentally disabled kids at Little City in Palatine, Il. Qualified to teach sports? My 'sport' during high school was water ballet, not exactly a transferable activity for this job.

I truly loved all of these kids and we played all kinds of games: baseball, basketball, and bowling. I was familiar with two of these sports having played baseball and basketball in high school. I was not gifted in either of these sports to say the least. As for bowling perhaps I had played once. For these teaching jobs I went to various parks throughout the Seattle area and as a newbie to the region, it was an excellent way for me to learn to navigate my new city. As the months grew, so did I. Looking decidedly like I was carrying a watermelon in my eighth month of pregnancy I was sent to teach bowling to the kids. I didn't hesitate to jump into something I knew absolutely nothing about as I figured correctly, neither did the kids. Well, picture if you will this 5'2'' young woman holding the bowling ball parallel to her enormous midsection and winding up for the strike. Yes, I created a sensation. A crowd formed to witness my gutter ball. Did that embarrass me or upset the kids? Not in the slightest. These kids were the definition of good sports: willing, eager, respectful and had a positive attitude. The crowd and I had a good chuckle at my condition and the kids proved to be happy just to try something new. I believed then as now, if you possess no dignity to lose, you lose no dignity. Better to have fun and enjoy yourself and that's exactly what the kids and I did that day and every day. Plus we had the opportunity to amuse people who might have avoided the kids. I believe I even garnered some assistants to help with my bowling "teammates".  

If at first you don't succeed, then maybe skydiving isn't for you.  Anon

I have applied this lesson to many other situations which could, and sometimes did, prove embarrassing. Because my sons and husband--- many years ago--- wanted to compete in a "fun run" prior to the county fair I agreed, not to be left out, to enter the race as well. I don't run and certainly had not a second of training but I was game. All ages lined up at the start, I dawdling toward the back of the pack. The gun fired and we were off. I thought "I'll walk and pleasantly talk to my fellow dawdlers" but I couldn't. Up ahead were my husband and sons and I was being passed by people much older than me. "That's just not going to happen", she foolishly said.  I took off running for all I was worth. Uphill and down hill I ran at a good clip for the five miles of the fun run. Did I win a medal? Did I catch up to my husband and sons? No and no. But I felt exhilarated at the finish line. Reality and embarrassment set in hours later when I could hardly walk--- the aches, pain and soreness a new regrettable experience. The lesson learned: if I'm going to participate in a sporting event, decide before hand if I want to pay the consequence of being ill prepared. Otherwise, best to not whine, be a good sport and simply enjoy whatever you're doing. 

susansmagicfeather 2023 Susan R. Grout