Small Town Therapist on Unbelievable Outcomes

 

After this last election many people are in a conundrum. Why is there so much divisiveness in the country? Why did our former president when in office from 2016 to 2020 with his Republican party tear down people, ignore science, insult minorities and women, threaten to disrupt the voting process get elected again? Weren't they supposedly want to MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN in 2016 and didn't. And now we have the same slogans and bigotry and greed staring us in the face again in 2025? 

I believe I have the answer that's been true since the Obama administration: they want to make America white again; make America anti women and anti minorities again; and make billionaires, trillionaires; and make America stupid again. 'Science, we don't need no stinkin' science!' Yet, ask someone why  they're voted four more years of this disastrous administration and they, to a person say, "I prefer their [GOP's] policies". What policies? 

Truth: these policies are anti choice, pro billionaires, and white power. Now look no further than Trump's choices for his Cabinet, not one competent or qualified person has been nominated. He's still an embarrassment and a disgrace. The world is baffled that we have chosen this felon, misogynist, right wing incompetent man again. So am I--- embarrassed and angry.

The latest proof of incompetence is the GOP Senators who are in lock step going along with all the terrible choices for his cabinet, like Secretary for the Defense Department. Have these people never read resume before? Pete Hegseth, yes was in the military but that doesn't qualify to run the military. It's widely known by his colleagues that he has a drinking problem. His qualification apparently is that he's a Trump enthusiast and a TV star on Fox News (listed as an entertainment program). There is no qualification. 

Here's some more sad history from Trump's four year term. Our dear competent Ruth Bader Ginsberg was the epitome of an excellent Supreme court judge, principled, courageous, fair, and who fought for equal justice for all. When she was dead one hour, the GOP administration announced that they were going to push ahead with a nomination, immediately. High minded reasons were given for not allowing President Obama's choice for the Supreme Court said McConnell,  "It's too close to the election (it was nine months away) and the new President should have the right to choose the SCJ."  The Republican party approved a Supreme Court nominee ONE Month before the election. The rage that some of us felt, this betrayal, was yet another slap in the face to integrity was overwhelming. 

Amy Coney Barrett, was and probably still is part of the group of Catholic women who believe that the "men are the heads of the household and make all the decisions." We were stuck with the pick and also Brett Kavanaugh. So it was goodbye to Roe vs Wade. So many of us worked long and hard to pass that bill for women's rights. Now it's possibly farewell to the ACA, 'Obama care', and forget about your concerns about the environment, the laws protecting us will be sabotaged. 

As we know, we are now getting a refresher course on when abortion was illegal. Women died in desperation and that is the situation today. The women, and sometimes young girls, in states where abortion is outlawed have no choice to safely terminate an unwanted pregnancy. 

I had a legal medical abortion many years ago. A baby I was carrying died inter utero at four months. Had it been just five years earlier, in 1972, I would have been required to carry that baby to 'spontaneous abortion' which could have cost me my life. This is to say nothing of the sadness and horror of carrying a dead, very wanted baby. Where is our protection for equal rights under the law? That's the 14th Amendment in our Constitution.

Let's reverse roles. Wonder if women were cruel and had the power of the laws behind them and wouldn't allow a man to have a choice of what to do with his reproductive rights. The husband comes to her and says, "I've been diagnosed with testicular tumors, probably cancerous, can I please have an operation to free myself from worry and pain?" The woman coolly appraises him and says, "NO, that might interfere with my right to have more babies. Let nature take it's course!" That's the position all women were in until 1973 when they won the right to have a say over their own bodies. The right to privacy with their physician was a hard fought battle. Now in many states it's still a very hard fought battle. Don't give up!

Another truth: a woman can get pregnant once a year. Ironically a man can impregnate many thousands of women, if he chooses to in one year. Why is the pregnancy burden always on the woman? That's some pretty fancy footwork: blame the woman. As we all have seen, people piously and obnoxiously stand outside the abortion clinics waving signs and begging women to not abort. Ah, but where are these pious people when that child is born? I can state emphatically--- they're not there to help that woman/girl. 

The reasons for abortion are many. It might be that she was raped or she was ill prepared to raise a child, or that she couldn't afford the child, or she was in ill health, or she was very young and/or it was a case of incest.  This is only a small list but it does provide very good reasons to have an abortion. The pious and obnoxious people are actually only pro birth, not willing to aid or give any help to that woman or girl after that child is born. Couldn't we agree to shift the blame. WHO got that woman pregnant?  Why isn't the emphasis on the men? 

On that topic of men, especially young men, I had some experience with disseminating information about birth control. Many years ago I'd was asked to talk to teens about the dangers involved with drugs and alcohol. Fortunately for me, this was well before the kinds of very dangerous drugs that are in many high schools these days. Inevitably the subject of girls drinking to drunkenness would come up. Some cocky boy would smirk and I would lead the discussion about the the responsibility of boys having or attempting having sex with an impaired girl. What about responsibility of possible impregnation as the consequences of having unprotected sex, or forced sex, rape?  I let them know that the lowest incidents of teen pregnancies in the world at that time were in Japan. Also, at that time, the only form of birth control in Japan was the condom.  A hush fell in the room.  All those years ago, no one to my knowledge was willing to speak to the obvious: it's clearly not just the woman who can do birth control, Japan proved that.

We all want loving relationships, don't we? We all want our children loved, fed and taken care of. Don't we also want truth, justice and the American way?  What has become of the American way? For parts of this country the belief is children are too delicate to learn about the Holocaust, the Trail of Tears, the slavery of African people etc. Why is our history and also the history of the world being withheld? We need a fresh course on creating empathy in our country and it starts in childhood. That used to be the American way. Now there are those who are attempting to justify racism, ignore the unfair advantages given to people of wealth and allowing women, minorities and people of color to be discriminated against. This has got to stop.

How I wish we had voted the rascals out. With the Democrats and at least we had hope, kindness and competence. My fear is that we will fall so far. Never doubt we can rise again. This country can become, again, the admired country. Right now we are a grieving country and our new (old) leaders have failed us, already, miserably. The historians voted the Trump Presidency as worst administration and they voted him the worst president we ever had.  Unbelievably he has been re elected. 

Don't just sit there join a group to fight all the egregiousness that is to come.

susansmagicfeather 2024  Susan R. Grout all rights reserved

Pandemic insights

Swimming is always good

During the Pandemic, starting in March, I realized that we were probably in this lock down for a long time. Our Governor urged: stay at home for the long haul; wear masks; and wash your hands thoroughly. All of this was for the benefit of  the most vulnerable and so we weren't spreading Covid. Masks have been proven to stop the threat of the virus. How I wish that this nation agreed with Inslee and me. Instead of a rather quick recovery, as witnessed in many parts of the world, we are going into our sixth month with no end in sight. Maskless idiots are ruining our chance for a "Get out of Jail Free" card.

Being an optimist I firmly, ha ha, believed that people would also want this stay at home order to end as quickly as possible. Erroneously people believed the nay sayers about staying safe, wearing a mask, washing hands carefully etc. and took to the beaches and bars and spread the virus far and wide. No help from the White House as Mr. T didn't want to muss his hair with a mask. Despite every evidence to the contrary, especially lessons learned from foreign countries that it was effective, T urged his followers to "liberate" themselves from the restrictions, be out there and party! 'Oh, no,' says I--- and about forty million rational people, 'here we go'. We're now at 160 K deaths, expected to go to 200 K in a couple of months. This is an outrage, unnecessary and the buck does stop at the White House. In sorrow and with great love,  I think of all those people and their families affected in that grim statistic and how they are mourning their loved ones. Because of the virus they aren't able to embrace each other safely or gather in large groups. 

One of the many revelations that I have had during this lock down was that I firmly believed I was an extrovert. I thought that I needed  a bunch of people to replenishes myself in times of stress. I found out differently. I am more introverted that I knew and am able to rejuvenate at home with my Mr. G, books, movies and guitar.  Taking matters into my own hands for the long period of few contacts with my friends and family, I decided to have this period of my life become meaningful and rich.

One of the things I vowed to do was read some of the books that I've collected over the years. One particularly beautiful book was The Renaissance. In this glorious, art filled, coffee table book each chapter was written by a different scholar, an expert writing about that period. This lovely tome weighs in at about three or four pounds and is huge. I could never read this book at night in bed, it would crush my chest.  

I started out most enthusiastically and roared into the 14th century thinking, "ah this will be such a reprieve from the pandemic"!  How wrong can one be? The Renaissance, from page one was filled with stories of the plague, constant wars, graphic brutal murders, political intrigue and many assassinations. Oh me or my. You can run but you can't hide. We are so not unique in history. 

Supposedly we are smarter than the citizens during the 14th to 16th centuries,  but some of  the United States citizens have proven that's not true. We have more sophisticated science, labs, literature and information but at this date, yet we haven't found a single vaccine and many of our citizens disbelieve the scientists and doctors. Exactly what century are they embracing? Alas we are stumbling along in the dark with this clever virus that is apparently,  always, ten feet ahead of us. 

What to do to avoid constant anxiety about the pandemic? Well, for one, set up a schedule. I read a column in the New York Times about women who went into space and were without human contact for more than a year. How on earth [tee hee] did they survive, even thrive in this isolation?  It turns out to a person they had a hearty schedule. Granted they were rigorously trained  for this extensive experience and they had important work to do. Some of you have the most important job in the universe: raising children. I am a mother but also a Grandmother with great longing to be near my grands, one of whom is starting [fingers crossed] college. [She is flying away but in actuality, really driving away.] So I started writing letters to each of the grands and have gotten three replies, not perfect, but I'll take it. One of my dear sisters and I have been exchanging letters and that has been wonderful. Receiving a letter in the mail is a delight. Now with the Threat of Starving the Post Office! by Mr. Cheating T, we are all in anticipation of theft by deprivation and a slowing of the mail so he can claim victory in November. Makes me sick. 

My schedule is nothing shocking or revelatory. My daily routines are fairly pedantic such as cooking meals although I try to make the meals varied and interesting, rarely boring.  I have a small garden that could overtake the world with cherry tomatoes. Who knew that they were as bad as over planting zucchini? Then I make a deal with myself to exercise each day knowing my reward is to be able to eat most anything I want. I schedule playing guitar and singing most days at 4 pm which I just read improves sleep and, for those of you who snore, one half hour of singing just might take that away. I relish all the time I can read especially at night in bed. Supposedly that is a no-no but I have always derived great pleasure being in bed with a good book. Then for the things that are only occasionally attacked like writing this blog, journaling and composing songs, I am an unfaithful attendant. I am a faithful attendant, and can take no credit, though I  value it deeply,  to the weekly zoom that I do with two of my sisters and three men from our guitar camp. We have a topic do discuss each week like "what is your favorite day of the week" and tell stories from our lives. Also each Monday Zoom includes a song that we perform from the topic at hand. This week the topic is HOPE and the song selection is Blues. It's always entertaining and enjoyable and I look forward to it. My husband and I watch movies at either educate or tickle us. Humor and education is very important at times like this. Weekly I do a bit of volunteering for the local Democrats group and hustle to get out the vote for various candidates. In ordinary times I would be volunteering with children at our local grade school or once most charmingly with a family that had triplets and a toddler.

Yikes the conquering tomatoes

That's what I've come up with to keep me sane and smiling. To reach the people I love we do Zoom and Face Time, of course it's not enough. So people, my plea to you is simple, please follow the guidelines that have been successful for so many other countries and let's get out of jail, free.

susansmagicfeather  copyright 2020 Susan R. Grout all rights reserved

Bullock  Oriole stops by 

Trust Your Gut and Ignore the Liars

There's a pig in the White House and in the air

Law and Order is like patriotism---anyone who comes on strong about patriotism has got something to hide; it never fails. They always turn out to be a crook or an asshole or a traitor...

Bill Mauldin

 Distrust all in whom the impulse to punish is powerful.                                                 Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche 

How about our current president is all three: crook, AH and traitor,  #45 and  this awful GOP administration.

As we have all seen, last month the Constitution of the United States of America was being tear gassed, the rights of citizens for a peaceful protest suddenly taken away from them for a photo opportunity by #45. Even the Marines head officer said, "there was use of excessive force" against the protesters and literally that has become a super aggressive and excessive force against the protesters in Portland, Oregon and now Seattle. These are men from the Black River militants who are owned by Betsy de Vos's brother and believe it or not hired to be militant. Who profits from all the chaos of unwanted militants sent into the Democratic cities? Why Betsy de Vos's brother of course. There is great profit in war for a very few...

Many of us fear mightily that before our eyes the country is losing ground to these right wing nut cases. Don't believe it. We need to keep uniting in our shock and disbelief that our own government could turn against us, the citizens. This is the mark of someone, I wonder who, wants to be a dictator. And who among us wants a liar, traitor, thief . I believe it's called grifting, one who  profits from being president and made all of his family rich at our expense.  That my friends is also called theft.

T's distraction and farce is suggesting that "we should postpone the election". Jimmy Fallon suggested that "what, like Republicans vote on Nov. 3rd and Democrats, TBD at a later date?" More ramblings from a very unstable idiot. Now he's attacking the Post Office, a treasured place to all of us, wishing to  destroy it hoping that will sway the election his way. This is not love for country instead it is love for self above all else.

Egomania in the hands of an ordinary man, while it is certainly irritating, is nothing in comparison to egomania in the hands of the man in the highest office in the nation. This folks is cause for grave concern. Speaking of grave concern, he "takes no responsibility" for botching the Covid recovery that we all deserved and didn't  get. I just read that Bret Stevens said "the important thing is for the GOP  to take such a shellacking in November that it will be as the political equivalent of an unsedated colonoscopy." Here, here! and hopefully everywhere the people will rid us of this nightmare of the #45 administration we've all been living for the past three and a half years. Please! I'm asking nicely and most sincerely. Vote them out.

Need I say more?

susansmagicfeather 2020 copy write Susan R. Grout all rights reserved 

A New Dating Site in an Improbable Place

With sisters in New Orleans

I had a surprise recently, when I was "forced" to go to the new app site for Scrabble, called Scrabble Go. I love playing Scrabble and play as often as I can.  I suspected the new app was created as a boost for advertisers but, gag, there is also  gambling and has loud obnoxious commercials as well. Sigh.  I naturally warned  all my favorites, my brother Bob and his singing partner Laura who regularly play with me, that I was signing off the site because of the grievances I foresaw playing this simple game on line. Well, I got spineless and started to get all these interesting challengers asking if I would play the game with them. Since my average number of points per turn was fairly high I figured that's why all the attention...well, no.

Interestingly, almost all of the challengers were males. I couldn't figure it out. Then there is a 'chat' feature which in the old Scrabble I used to converse with my favorites, old friends and my brother. Well, every single man that "challenged" me with point averages as great as mine or better [the only requests that I accepted] wanted to chat. You've probably guessed that's not what they really were after. 

I started to feel like I was a secret member of the lonely heart's club. To a man they wanted to know: exactly where I lived;  my occupation; one guy even typed "can we be special friends?"; was I married?; one man asked "can we could get to know each other better?"; it goes on and on. Curiously they would repeatedly ask the same questions and I realized that they were repeating themselves, I pointed this out. 

Very soon, I learned I could turn off chat, but at first I was perplexed by all the chatty men...then I figured it out. Almost all were in isolating jobs with lots of time on their hands. All were divorced, some widowed but generally hoping to find relationship on line in this peculiar fashion. My profile picture is a nice one, several years old so hard to tell my age. I'm blond and smiley. Hmmm.

Although I did feel sad for them, especially at their pathetic attempt to engage an anonymous woman who plays a pretty good game of Scrabble in a "relationship". Frankly it started to feel creepy and I could no long tolerate the distraction from the game.  

Finally I muted the chat line. Here is the suggestion I have for anyone who is a Scrabble player, female and might desire some male attention, sign up for Scrabble Go and use a nice somewhat flattering picture of yourself.  If you desire a friend,  soul mate or a relationship Scrabble Go could be the venue for you! Seriously though, I don't think this is a good idea. You never know who is on the other end of the game on their computer. It really could be a scammer, or could be lots worse than a scammer. So before you mute your chat my suggestion is you take the compliment of the all that attention then giggle with me and mute them ASAP. 

 

 susansmagicfeather 2020 copyright all rights reserved Susan R. Grout 

If There Was A Film: The Answers You Don't Want

At times in my life I want everything. Whatever I touch or think would turn to into gold. That, I realize is delusional thinking but quite frankly fun to do. The imagination soars, the flights of fancy are serving cocktails and everything I desire is served on a silver platter accompanied with delectable pupus. Thus, here I sit desiring, hoping and praying that this Corvid virus would up and disappear. Poof! We'd all go to the seashore! 

Sincerely,  mine is just a wish. I have taken the cautions very seriously: washing my hands well and frequently; always wearing my mask everywhere; sticking close to home; and socially distancing from all I encounter. Most terribly that's not the case for more and more Americans. They've foolishly abandoned the precautions and so have their leaders and their states. Gee, guess what? their number of infections have risen dramatically. This is so discouraging especially to my optimistic mind and heart.

Even though our citizens have been warned time and time again that this virus is a killer, that even if they contract a "light case of the virus" they could be looking at months, to years of recovery from it's deleterious effects. Lung, heart, immune system damage--- just to name a few of the repercussions. One of the reasons that people are taking this so lightly is no one is filming inside the hospitals the horrors of what people who have contracted the virus are going through. We'd need to see, in real time, our people fighting the virus. Obviously, the filming is far too dangerous for the person filming and for anyone in the hospital. But, as with the murder of George Floyd, seeing is believing and has galvanized our nation. Here is reality: one of my friend's wife, an ICU nurse said, "if people are admitted to ICU they are either going to die or come out of this disease with life long physical problems".  That seriously effects all of us. This will be the ruination of many a family's finances and their future, to say nothing of the enormous grief and heartbreak.

In the NW part of Canada the infection numbers are far below ours in the states. Sensibly, they have restricted their borders from US citizens with the exception of people who want to get to Alaska. Those who are not very ethical have claimed they are going to Alaska and have been caught lodging all over BC and Alberta. Not nice. One of the reasons the Canadians have much better numbers, lower infection rates and deaths than we do, is the Canadians have citizens who respect mask wearing and social distancing. Now they too, might have the invasion of the unmasked. Hopefully those prevaricators will be caught and sent back. Catch and release just like fish.

I live in a tourist community and it is gravely frustrating to see tourists flouting Governor Inslee's mask order for the entire state. These people believe they are special and do not have to keep our population safe. What is really sad is my community has one the most elderly populations in the state. How can these maskless, heartless creatures be okay with possibly infecting some of our beloved elderly people? This could literally cause their death. That is an outrage.

Of course, as you know, the person who serves as the best 'bad case example' is--- our president. Currently, despite the probability of infection, he holds those political rallies, [that we pay for] and he goes maskless. He mistakenly touts his handling of the virus as brilliant, paying no attention to the death toll and the infection rate. His supporters, as sheep, bleating along go maskless also. Proof of how well he has handled the Covid virus is we're nearly number one! as one of the worst in the world for Covid deaths.  2.5million have contracted the virus and of those millions 123+thousand have died. All of those citizens, all of that torment and possible impoverishment for their families. This is an underestimation, a gross underestimation. The latest by the CDC says the "estimate of how many have contracted Covid is probably 10 times that 2.5 million figure" so really 20 million cases. And of the death rate, it's probably so much more because many, many people avoided hospitals and have just quietly died at home.  T suggestion "we need to quit doing all the testing."

One of the big reasons for my tireless day dream of the virus disappearing is that I dearly, passionately, miss seeing my grandchildren and my sons. The depressing fact is according to 511 epidemiologists [from and article in the New York Times], to a person, said they would not get on a plane for one year.  One year. Yet people are starting to fly all over the country.  I am sticking with the scientist and the scientific research. Grounded. Do I want it otherwise? you bet I do.

susansmagicfeather copyright 2020 Susan R. Grout all rights reserved

On Being Expendable

                               Jared needs a facial, his eyebrows flying higher
                               Ivanka needs a company for the highbrows to aspire

Donald's rage is festering at reporters who are pestering
with facts he claims are bendable
and adds, we're all expendable!

He's fired all the staff
who spoke to science and to truth
brags on the pandemic
though the efforts are a spoof
Science is by the way side
apparently so am I,

since I'm over 60
                                I must be prepared to die,
                                to them: I'm expendable.

My life's work is helping people,
giving all my healing thoughts,
being useful, kind and generous
are the values that I've sought.
I'm rough and ready,
I roll heavy logs up hill                             

I work hard for the Democrats
expect I always will.
Yet, I'm the one who's expendable.

I used to find this obnoxiousness, 

amusing and somewhat funny.
GOP's goofiness in their grasp for power and money,          
but now they're indefensible
they've have flunked every human test
with this virus looming over us
they'll strive to put me to rest.

Me, I'm having none of it,
let the nuts be mask less and mugging.                          

Bring that disease home to their families
who will soon regret the hugging.
Guess their families are expendable.

susansmagicfeather 2020 copyright Susan R. Grout all rights reserved

Don't Turn Away! Become the Person You Want Your Children to Be

Knowing what is right is important to all humans but the more difficult task is doing what is right.

Before us we have a study in the worst examples of human interactions played out this week in our country. The president forwarded a clip by a New Mexico supporter that stated, "the only good Democrat is a dead Democrat." He did that. I am a life long Democrat. Emphasis on life.

All of the protests, all across the country, started as a last straw attempt to call out the cruel, egregious murder of a black man, George Floyd by a callous, out of control police officer in Minnesota. The video went viral. What sickened me is George was saying over and over again, "I can't breathe." Worse to me, as a mother, grandmother, aunt, and great aunt, was Mr. Floyd's final words were "Mama!'  That poor man, looking to help him in his desperation, cried out to his mother who loved him. Nothing could be sadder than hearing that man. Imagine, your son, murdered for a frivolous reason by a bully. That punched me, as a mother, right in the gut and heart. When I saw the pictures of this cop with his knee on George's neck I couldn't sleep that night. Now imagine, if I, or you, had a son of color, what would that be like for you? Knowing that if your son is a certain color they are targeted by the White Supremacists crowd. How could you sleep? This is against everything that our country stands for, "life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness."

My Mama 

This man T, was the one elected to the highest office in this country by the electoral college, not the popular vote. As this narcissistic ego maniacal man has stated "the shooting begins" when he heard the country had blown up due to this injustice and there was looting. He has openly encouraged violence against the citizens of this country. He has called the White Supremacists, "very fine people," just so you know whose side he is on.

Yesterday, he held a photo op for himself in front of the Episcopalian church, St. Johns, which is across the street from the White House. This was a calculated show. Interestingly Adolph Hitler did the same in the 1930's in Germany.  Also interestingly, prior to T's march to the Church he and the Attorney General ordered tear gassing all of the peaceful demonstrators to make way for his staged showing of a Bible at the church's front. The Episcopalian Bishop Mariann Budde said, "I am outraged" at the president's behavior. He violated a peaceful demonstration with force, took the photo op, with bible in front of the church, no prayer or wise words and left to cower in the White House. Bishop Budde was never

consulted. It's her church.

What have we become? I see evidence of a Police State. I only had glimpses of the rioting in the streets and the sickening police response of brutal retaliation, in some areas of our beloved country. This is nuts! Alternatively, this is the beginnings of what T wanted all along---with his call for violence against his citizens. "The only good Democrat..."

We have got to get these people out of office, they are literally dangerous, greedy and hateful. Please join me in doing everything possible to get good citizens to vote them out. In truth,  there are a preponderance of good Democrats that believe in human rights, life liberty and the pursuit of happiness.

susansmagicfeather 2020 copyright Susan R. Grout all rights reserved

Small Town Therapist on Death of a Dear Sister

Losing love is like a window in your heart, everybody sees you're blown apart, everybody sees the wind blow.                                        Paul Simon

This death, of Kathleen Ricketts Shaffner my sister, one year ago has been difficult. She was so full of life, humor, talents, ideas and dreams that the fact that she was gone, felt unreal, impossible. Never to see, never to talk to her again kept rattling around in my brain. The sadness of this loss has only slowly has lessened. 

Now, one year later, a cataclysmic change in the world and in my thinking. Today, we are living in the age of the pandemic. So many in our country and in the world are grieving the loss of a beloved, none of us are alone in our grief.  However, I wonder what it would have been like if Kathleen had died this year? For one, we would never have been able to gather [more that 300 strong, relatives and the town of Carbondale] to celebrate Kathleen ---the funny, lovely, interesting person that she was. This would have horribly compounded our grief for all of us. I want to reach out to all the people who cannot honor their dead in a community and in a loving fashion. I want to reach out, with my sincere condolence to their big loss and here is my virtual hug. Our hearts, my heart, are with you in declaration of your loss, this profound loss, compounded by the realities of keeping safe, with social and physical distancing.

I 'm also feeling somewhat guilty for feeling gratitude that Kathleen died when she did last year. Her last action was driving to see her younger son, an act of deep love that would not have been possible this year.  In a odd way I want to thank Kathleen for dying when she did. Because she died last year, April 28th 2019, we were able to gather a month later and we renewed old friendships, visited with relatives we hadn't seen for years and solidified our resolve to stay  in touch. Many of us to continue to stay in touch, and most of us pledged to keep music in our lives always. Several of the siblings, myself included, wrote songs about Kathleen. All of the siblings and many of the cousins, [and even though we're not able to see each other in person], are very much in contact.  That is the gift of love she gave us.

Also, because of Kathleen's fatal heart attack, many of us have sought treatment for various health related issues. Many of us, myself included, have since treated high blood pressure with medication and several of us, me as well, have had echocardiograms to check on the workings of our hearts. Currently, one of us, her dear son and our darling nephew, just had surgery to correct faulty vessels in his heart. This would never have been discovered without the push of Kathleen's death. We are grateful. In fact, Kathleen's death saved lives.

susansmagicfeather copyright 2020 Susan R. Grout all rights reserved

Read, Read, Read

One of best lessons I had as a young woman working at a Children's hospital was from a nurse who was giving 'Rounds'. These rounds happened, weekly or sometimes only monthly.  I wasn't always able to attend as I was taking care of the very sick kids. One of the things that the nurse stressed was something that was taught in her training.  She held up a medicine bottle and said "a very underrated but incredibly important part of our job is to dispense these pills. In doing so we were taught to "read, read, read" three times before administering a drug to a patient." This scrappy little nurse continued, "this isn't just a small factoid, it is literally a method of saving lives." That stuck with me. Paying close attention requires an intent focus and to be very acutely conscious and present for the important things in life.

Along those lines The Checklist Manifesto  by Dr. Atul Gawande makes a strong case to use a checklist in basically every home and business operation to improve outcomes. Checklist are imperative in hospitals and when used religiously do in fact save lives. Also each and every time a pilot flies a plane, she goes through a checklist. A good teacher prepares her students with a checklist of what is expected of them and what they will cover in class.  Frequent reviewing of the goals and expectations help in my field of counseling,

This rule of read, read, read is even important in cooking. For a professional chef this is imperative. Though I have to confess that I am an "eyeball it" and wing it sort of chef but then I'm only pleasing myself and my guests. I do make a practice of reading cookbooks like  they are novels and  from those basic recipes I will rift like a musician or an artist. I could somewhat successfully argue that being a cook for close to half a century makes me confident in what is necessary for a delicious meal, however even if I don't rigorously follow a recipe, I do read, read, read, what is necessary for the dish.

How about using read, read, read for success in life? I ran into a friend of one of my nieces on the ferry a couple of months ago--we were delighted to catch up with each other.  She said, to my surprise,  "you told me something when I was floundering at 18 because I hadn't entered college yet and was so unsure about what to do in my life... You said, just continue to read, and read all the time." I didn't  remember this but I was pleased I had encouraged her to read, read, read because books and reading is so very important in life. Then she continued, " I took the advice to heart and it has helped me throughout my life, in college and with my career."

We read books to find out who we are. What other people, real or imaginary, do and think and feel is an essential guide to our understanding of what we ourselves are and may become.                                                                                                                    Ursula K. LeGuin 

I don't know what I'd do if it weren't for books.                                                                          Jane Ricketts 

I am a reader and it gives me the greatest pleasure, comfort and solace. Reading has opened worlds to me, to other's dreams and ideas, to sympathies for people I will never met or know, to ones who may not even exist. All four of my grandchildren are readers, blessed by the fact that their parents are readers and read to them at early ages. Now they, and we, continue to embark on the most tantalizing of journeys: the journey into worlds that are different and possibly more complex than our own. Our only equipment we need for these distant ports is our eyes, sufficient light, a comfortable spot, some quiet and lots of snacks. The treats and the treasures await us with the right books and I'm a true believer that those that say "I really don't enjoy reading," just haven't stumbled upon the right books. I watch this phenomena occur before my eyes in my office when I hear that stale retort from clients. I quiz them on where their interests lay and then I throw out about half a dozen titles to try. Always successful? Well, no, but the successes keep me as hooked as one of those dreadful match makers. It's such a high when it does work. Then the love affair can really begin.

I cannot imagine life without books. They are a comfort and a source of information, a place to discover other ideas, lives and dreams. When I had clients who would claim they didn't like to read, I always said, "you just haven't found the right book." To find the right book depends on the person's taste, their circumstances, their history.

Oscar Wilde said, "to love one's self is the beginning of a life long romance" and I believe this is also true with books. Hold them, treasure them, give them, love them and share them, your world will expand and abound.

susansmagicfeather 2020 copyright, all rights reserved, Susan R. Grout

Today I Saved the World

To accomplish great things, we must not only act, but also dream.                           Anatole France

Day #24 of Covid 19 isolation.

a lovely art piece that resembles books

I am doing many, many things in my home that are quite unusual. Today I actually dusted and thoroughly cleaned the bookcase on the the stairway landing. In the past, each day I'd stop for a moment on that landing, looking at the dust filled books and sigh, so much dust, sigh, do nothing, then continue down the stairs. Not today. I have a favorite trick to get myself to do an odious task, I tell myself, "I'll do just this one shelf and in only ten days I'll have the entire bookcase cleaned!"

the start of the process, books etc. on the stairs 

This doesn't account for that ADD 911 part of my personality that won't allow me to stop with a reasonable amount of work or cleaning. Also there is the creative part of me that believes, "this would look so much better if I rearranged these books and added some of the pictures, artfully placed between them." And off I go. What I thought would be a quick twenty minute project turned into an hour and a half romp. By noon I had done almost every shelf  [eight, the last two are too high for me to safely reach and Mr. G will have to tackle them]. I was a human dust ball myself and marched out on my deck to de-robe and catch my breath.  In the process of my cleaning binge, I did discover one thing that was literally earth shaking.

Voila, dust free!

I have an enormous fondness for the Earth, our mother. So much so that I have a small but robust collection of globes.  I have the regular size one, four that are bookends and one that I gave away that was a pencil sharpener. When I was diligently attending to cleaning off each book, picture frame and object d'art I discover to my dismay that two of the bookend globes were upside down! Horrors!

I immediately, after I had those little Earths shiny clean again, I turned them right side up. Now the world can breathe a sigh of relief. The world is no longer Topsy Turvy but has been righted, by me. While I may not have the TV ratings, or the ego to go with it, I did turn the world right side up. You can expect great things to start happening soon. Anytime now, very soon.

 Remember who to thank.

susansmagicfeather copyright 2020 Susan R. Grout all rights reserved

Never Break the Chain

A human chain of loved people

And if you don't love me now
You can never love me again
I can still hear you say      that you'll never break the chain.                          Fleetwood Mac

We're all isolated and this is a new reality. This is happening in many parts of the country and all over the world with the Covid19 virus threat.  It's no picnic but I can hardly complain. I'm retired and among the most blessed at this time of crisis in the world. I live in the country on acres of mostly wooded land and I can walk miles right now without running into anyone. My neighbors are also taking the physical distancing seriously, bless them. I'm not a hoarder but a recovering Catholic from a large family and a restaurant family to boot. Food has always been a loved and respected part of my life. Like my Japanese and Jewish friends I have a very well stocked pantry. My husband and sons would laugh at that modest description. In fact the pantry is always stuffed with essentials to see me through for weeks, possibly a year.

I've recently started to Zoom.  Initially this was with my sisters and a couple of guys from our guitar camp and soon will do so with my sons and their families. This is delightful yet frankly leaves me with a longing to embrace all of them. How I delight in those faces, how I miss the physical contact.

All of us are facing isolation differently.  In some cases where people are needing contact, several women who I care about deeply, have sent me requests to offer poems, songs, or inspirational quotes. Doesn't that sound divine? However, all of these request by email or text ask me to forward, cut and paste the information to from eight to twenty [!] women. I'm ask for your forgiveness up front because these are all chain letters of a sort and I swore years ago I would never do that again. I will break the chain every time. I'm notoriously the pill who agonizes but doesn't follow through, hence breaking the chain. I'm sorry to disappoint, but not sorry enough to follow through with the requests.

Listen to the wind blow,

People with lots of stuff in the air

down comes the night                       Running in the shadows,
damn your love, damn your lies
Break the silence,                                  damn the dark, damn the light       Fleetwood Mac

Inevitably the chain mail or texting doesn't feel fun or exciting instead, to me,  feels like a burden. I believe it only encourages people to think I actually like to forward these messages to others. When I think of the woman receiving the chain letter, I imagine, like me, she might just shake her head and sigh deeply with a feeling of dread. Don't know. Fill me in on your opinion, please. Perhaps the rest of the known female population is waiting in anticipation for the next chain mail or text with the opportunity to connect. Want to Zoom or write a chatty email, or send an interesting article my way? I'm your girl.

I'm breaking the silence. I'm not willing to participate in a 'chain' of any kind. I want to thank, and  I  will! all the women who sent me the texts or emails. Seriously, I truly prefer the no obligation communication: I'll send a thank you note and expect no answer necessarily to my thank you note. Otherwise it's thank you for your thank you note, I've been meaning to thank you...etc.

susansmagicfeather  copyright 2020 Susan R. Grout all rights reserved, thank you.

                 

Potential Heroes!

Our children are the most important product

The only true happiness comes from squandering ourselves for a [good] purpose.                                                 John Mason Brown

I see in the near future a crisis approaching that unnerves me to tremble for the safety of my country...corporations have been enthroned and an era of corruption in high places will follow.                                                           Abraham Lincoln

It came to me all of a sudden, a worthwhile suggestion and I am confident would be successful and do wonders for the working people of this country. In addition to a stimulus package there could be addition billions available.

Here are the salaries of the top CEOs in this country per year!

1. Elton Musk. $513. M
2. Brendan Kennedy $250 M
3. [Jeff Bezos only takes a salary of 82 K but is worth 200 billion]

don't be like the above

• #3. Bob Iger. $146.6M.
• #4. Tim Cook. $141.7M.
• #5. Nikesh Arora. $130.7M.
• #6. David Zaslav. $122.1M.
• #7. James Heppelmann. $71.5M.
• #8. Stephen Schwarzman. $69.1M.
• #9. Tony James. $66.2M.
• #10. Stephen Angel. $66.2M.
• 
  

•  Company: AMC Networks (AMCX) • Annual compensation: $29.6 million. ...
• • Company: Expedia Group (EXPE) ...
• • Company: Mattel (MAT) ...
• • Company: Allergan (AGN) ...
• • Company: Weight Watchers International (WTW) ...
• • Company: Wynn Resorts (WYNN) ...
• • Company: United Therapeutics (UTHR) ...
• • Company: Walt Disney (DIS)
•  Company: AMC Networks (AMCX) • Annual compensation: $29.6 million. ...
• • Company: Expedia Group (EXPE) ...
• • Company: Mattel (MAT) ...
• • Company: Allergan (AGN) ...
• • Company: Weight Watchers International (WTW) ...
• • Company: Wynn Resorts (WYNN) ...
• • Company: United Therapeutics (UTHR) ...
• • Company: Walt Disney (DIS)

The above salaries add up to way over a billion dollars especially if you include the first twenty of the top salaries of CEO's. Why not go for broke [ha ha] and include the top fifty CEOs? I'm willing to bet that figure is closer to a trillion dollars. And remember this is just a partial list of the men and what they "earned" for themselves for a year. Let's look realistically at these amounts. Who in their right mind thinks that the "work" that these CEOs do justifies the vast fortunes allotted them?

Let's turn our attention instead to the work of all of our health care workers, the truckers, the grocery employees, the poor unemployed, the laid off laborers, all the teachers, etc. do for their salaries. How many of these good people are having an easy time of life right now. I read that many of these good people have not been able to keep up with their mortgages car payments. Repossession and bankruptcies for these good, hard working people. Not me, but a friend did the math and used Bezos wealth alone and figured out he could donate $20 K to all the families with incomes under $150 K per  year right now without hurting his vast fortune. That's just one person in the illustrious group above.. Instead his workers had to march for a $2 raise. This is the height of nuttiness. Imagine if all of the above men contributed to financing the financial health of the American worker instead of squandering their fortunes. Imagine the thriving economy of people being paid a fair wage. Imagine the thriving start up American businesses. Imagine. No child caged or hungry. Housing problems solved for the homeless. Imagine. 

We can love these very fortunate men and still be amazed that this ridiculous inequity goes on in this country and in many other countries and no one even complains. Well, some do... Let me say there is a method to my madness in suggesting these men could contribute to the good of the country. Let's see. Fifty salaries of a trillion dollars go proportionally to the populations of the fifty states. each year. Honestly, it could make literally a world of difference. A life saving solution that is simple and I, Susan R. Grout am challenging all of those in the lucky top fifty CEO salaries to be a hero. A prize of my choosing will be awarded to the top five winners.

the super moon graces the morning

Bill and Melinda Gates can be used as an example. Their philanthropy is legendary and have made their wealth a mission to literally help the world's people. Hint, hint.  Makes sense doesn't it? Especially now?

Thanks for reading. Join me in these suggestions. Why not?
Feel free to share this post or any other, just acknowledge me as the author.

susansmagicfeather copyright 2020 Susan R. Grout all rights reserved

A Fantasy about the Covid 19 Virus

To live without hope is to cease to live.                                      Fyodor Dostoevsky 

Happiness is not the absence of conflict, but the flexibility and determination to cope with unpleasant circumstances.                                                      Susan R. Grout

So, here we all are, not traveling, not going to a show, not congregating in big churches, not marching in parades, not attending restaurants, not passing the time in crowded buses or trains, keeping a  six foot social distance from our fellow citizens. We are [if we have the good fortune] at home facing weeks of self imposed quarantine. I'm hoping for the best, that there is a quick cessation to the Covid19 virus. Dream on you say! O.K. I will.


Here are the secret fantasies/dreams that I have about the outcomes of Covid19:

1. because billions of people are not flying and not driving their cars during this quarantine, our poor Earth will literally get a breather,
2. because the Earth is getting a breather people can see the vast array of stars in the sky at night,
3. because the Earth will get a breather the pollution will be lessened and several million people who have lung sensitivities to pollution will breather freer,
4. because several million people will breathe more easily, their will health improve, they will be able to help the people and children in great need,
5. because people have cared and helped, the people in greater need will prosper and be enriched,
6. because the people are prospering and are in less need themselves, they will reach out to those less fortunate than themselves,
7. because there is less pollution we will all see and hear more birds singing and see the animals thriving,
8. because people are spending more time attempting to thrive at home they are rediscovering cooking and cleaning and love making, 
9. because people are rediscovering love making there will be an unprecedented number of babies being born in 2021, 
10. because of the huge number of babies families start to take seriously the climate change crisis for their newborns sake and ramp up the need to support others less fortunate than themselves,
11. because new babies are welcomed into families the millionaires and the billionaires of the world finally step up to help those less fortunate than themselves. 
12. because those less fortunate includes the homeless and the immigrants, they will reach out to their leaders to apply resources to this group and demand all silly wastefulness stop,
13. because silly wastefulness is underscored by a wall that is tearing apart habitat for animals, destroying the Native American burial sites, costing in the billions of dollars and tearing up historic sites they will demand stoppage,
14. because the leaders have been positively affected by this reasonable request they will stop the wasteful, destructive wall,
15. because the wall is stopped the billions of dollars will go to helping all people, including those who are fleeing dangerous countries,
16. because the people will finally realize that this administration is prejudice against immigrants,
17. because there is compassion for the immigrants people realize that all the old, homeless and vulnerable people are in danger of the Covid19 virus and the Trump administration is responsible,
18. because the people know that the current GOP Administration almost destroyed the CDC, disbanded the Pandemic governmental agency and left the U.S. totally unprepared for this Pandemic they will be voted out, 
19. because the elected Republican leaders will pout and whine and try to blame us, we will laugh in their faces and tell them the time is for caring and compassion, 'out you go', 
20. because it is time for compassion, people will use their time to reconnect in positive ways, 
21. because people are connecting in positive ways, sharing goodwill is admired again and hatred is a thing of the past, 
22. because the people have woken to good will for all, they will want the best for all people and vote for science and intelligent programs, 
23. because intelligence and science are embraced, our children, grandchildren and our country flourishes, 
24. because we are flourishing there is a Renaissance and an appreciation of all the arts, America becomes ground zero for hope and beauty.

Amen.

susansmagicfeather 2020 copyright Susan R. Grout all rights reserved